Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Remembering Mama Part II: A Thanksgiving Eve Story

The best gift I ever recieved from my Mama came to me in the form of a letter, shortly after she was released from jail. Even today, after all these many years, I still get some measure of comfort and peace each time I read it. The letter is dated December 29th, 1979.

My Dear Daughter...I'm writing you to say I'm sorry and to ask forgiveness for all I've said & done. Not only to you but to myself.

You see, Mama just got out of prison. Yes, prison. In Point-a-La-Hache I was drunk and they kept me there for 15 days, when I took real sick with my heart and they brought me to Chairty Hospital late that night. But for the 15 days that I was there I'm proud to say, I REALLY found Jesus!

These ladies came on the first Saturday I was there and they saw me crying and asked me if I would like to be saved and I said yes. You see, I only thought I was saved before that day in jail. I wasn't only sick in my body, but I was sick in my soul.

They wouldn't let the ladies in my cell but there was a hole in the door where they passed the food to me- about 6 inches high and 12 inches long and Mrs. Logan and I prayed for a long time and I have never felt so good in my life as I did that day.

I can only say, I did find peace and contentment in that cold cell that day. But after that it wasn't nearly as hard for me as it had been and I praise God for saving me, even though it had to be in prision.

Maybe that is what it took for me to realize the true me. At first I felt ashamed, but not anymore. I plan on going back to church next Sunday and continue to serve my Lord as He would want me too. I don't have any fine clothes, but that's ok too.

I'm just proud, you'll never know, that I can truly say I'm saved and I KNOW God has a place in His house for me.

...Love all of you, Mama

I am so very thankful for all that God has blessed my life with...

... Including the hope of seeing my Mama in heaven some day...clean, sober and at peace...finally.

**PS: And Mama...if your listening...I forgive you...I really do**
1 Thessalonians 5:18 In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Blessings, MeMawfree avatars


Penless Thoughts said...

Thanks for sharing such a touching and intimate item in your life.

Jenn said...

Well, what a beautiful post. I haven't ever seen that letter..I would love to. You know it such a day to day struggle for each person to deal with his/her particular bonds and chains. I can see VERY easily how she constantly got caught up in the cycle of addiction. Most people do drugs/alcohol so that they don't have to have any feelings at all. If I remember her past like you have told me, she had some difficult memories to try to, as the Bible says, "for we wrestle not against flesh and blood but against powers and principalities, rulers of the darkness." I guess, she battled the only way she knew how, the thief on the cross never came down and had fellowship suppers and taught Sunday School..I love you, Happy Thanksgiving, Jen

Robbin with 2 B's! said...

So glad she wrote that to you and it brings you such comfort. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.